I’m a single guy renting a third-story condo overlooking the Neuse River, and with inflation being so high, I’ve decided to get a roommate and give up my extra bedroom. The guy that moved in with me is a little strange and has a very small toy “Yorkie” Terrier. Since we’re on an upper story, he has put a little green “turf” pad on the balcony where this little dog goes potty so he doesn’t have to get up during the night or get in the elevator to take the dog outside. Now that it’s so hot outside, the pad is starting to smell. I’ve asked him to clean it up regularly so I can still sit outside and enjoy myself on the balcony—which he has done. However, yesterday I opened the freezer to get a popsicle and was shocked to find a Ziplock freezer bag filled with tiny, little, frozen dog turds. Who does something like that? And how in the world do I deal with this situation?
Signed,
Rancid Roommate
Dear Rancid Roommate,
Well, I have to say, I’ve heard lots of problems in my time, but this is a first.
On one hand, it is totally disgusting to have dog poop in your freezer. On the other hand, maybe he did that because he didn’t want to stink up the trash can in your little condo. Look on the bright side: at least he was trying to adhere to your household rules. Or he is a total freak. Either way, we need to find another solution (and in the meantime, hide the steak knives).
Here’s my best advice:
At the pet store, there is a little device that is designed to help people clean their litter boxes. Since I have five cats, this device has been a lifesaver for me. Essentially, the lid opens, you drop in the waste, and a tray opens and disposes of the poop in a little contained bag below. Ta-dah! No more freezer doo-doo and this little plastic treasure won’t smell up your balcony.
I hope this helps and remember: cleanliness is next to godliness, so give this guy and his little dog the boot if they don’t clean up their act.
Love,
Henrietta
Henrietta Craven was born and raised in New Bern and enjoys gardening, hunting bears and improvisational dance. She is a self-proclaimed expert on a wide variety of subjects including (but not limited to) fashion, mixology, and cooking. Henrietta resides in a lovely Victorian home in downtown New Bern with her five cats: Graffenreid, Bethune, Devereux, Stanton and Carraway.